Remember late Urkel? When Jaleel White was bodybuilding and posing for calendars but they STILL put him in the urkel costume?
FUCK that was creepy.
Well sometimes Urkels have to get beasty.
What do I hate about roller derby right now? Not a whole lot of skating. Skate, chase, hit, flee, that is what I want.
But LORD that is not the game. The game now starts with walls. I SUCK in the wall. I wonder if I can hide it a little bit though, because I can plow stop like a motherfucker. In 5 feet, maybe 3 with motivation. But then I can be steamrolled out of the wall like my wheels are greased. What gives yo?
I got some expert advice from the lovelies over at the Boston Derby Dames. Basically my problem is that my knees point straight at each other when I plow stop. The answer? Strength training, duh, especially my posterior chain. i.e. butts and hamstrings. Pretty much everyone has an anterior/posterior imbalance, and ironically the most active people are the most imbalanced too. Your average couch blob has quads that are maybe 30% stronger than the hammies. A skater who doesn't cross train? Oh, maybe 120%. Or more. Which means that only certain muscles (the strong ones, duh) are recruited for any given movement while the weak ones get even weaker.
My quads are decent. My abductor/adductors are freakishly strong. My hammies are weak noodles. My glutes are okay but don't play well with others. All these things add up to a knock kneed disaster, if some banging eggshells.
Culprit at the moment for me: I did what I want, Cartman style. Lots of scrimmaging, lots of running, pretty much NO weight training. Whoops. Well, also nerve and muscular damage from a long-running spinal horro show but there is not changing the past.
So I am a few weeks into the new plan and refining it: 20 minutes (NO MORE), but 3 times a week. So far it is going well.
The exercises (functional, compound, and posterior emphasized):
At home - equipment is an 8 pound medball, 15 pound kettlebell, BOSU, and standing bag:
Kettlebell swings (hip hinge) - due to light weight, these are "switch swings" and pretty aerobic
Good mornings
BOSU split squats
BOSU up-and-over walking lunge
BOSU girlie push-up
BOSU boat
BOSU Russian twist
BOSU sumo squate
BOSU balance squat (flat side)
BOSU one-foot balance (both sides)
Medball slams - due to light weight, catch with one hand and flip over basketball-style to work those triceps
Goblet squat to overhead press
Blocking from a squat to the heavy bag
BOSU glute bridges (one and two footed, hold and pulse)
Planet Fitness. Pros - cheap (even for a memebership that allows you to bring a buddy), good layout. Cons - no kettlebells or stability equipment, no medballs about 10 pounds, open hostility to serious lifting.
My current exercises, using a 20 to 30 pound bent barbell
Simple deadlift
Around the world lunges
Split squat
Clean and jerk
Deadlift to overhead press
Upright row
Toes up squat
Bicep curl
Skull crushers
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